What should you answer if? How to react and respond to insults and rudeness - example phrases. How to answer the question “How are you?” from a stranger

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    No one wants to just put up with the rudeness and rudeness that can be heard V public transport, at work, online, and just on the street.

    There is no need to play the role of the victim, but learn to react correctly to aggression towards you.

    Obviously, for most people, being rude to them can have a negative impact. influence well-being, self-esteem and performance.

    How to respond to rudeness

    To be able to respond to rudeness, you first need to work on increasing your self-esteem.

    It is worth noting that it is not easy to be rude to a person with a strong spirit.

    And yet, if you urgently need to know how to communicate with a boor, then you can use one or more methods of struggle.

    Responses to rudeness


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    Calm

    When talking to people like this You should never show them that you are confused. Try to express your point of view frankly, firmly and openly.

    Try not to get defensive and speak calmly and relaxed.

    Most often, rude people are weak, envious people who have difficulty getting used to honesty and calmness, and sometimes do not know these words at all. They take energy for their negativity from precisely those people who succumb to rudeness and begin to get nervous. Don't let them "feed" on your nervousness.

    Sneezing


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    This method is more suitable as a reaction to prolonged rudeness.

    If the person who is rude to you cannot stop, you may well be able to help him do so.

    First, try listening to him calmly until he himself is convinced that he is right. After this, sneeze loudly and demonstratively - there will be a short pause, during which you calmly say the phrase: "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." and politely add: "So where did you stop?"

    Aikido


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    Simply put: you give me, I give you. This method transfers your interlocutor’s negativity onto himself. You just need to agree with his attacks against you, thank him for the time and effort spent emphasizing your shortcomings.

    You can even praise your interlocutor for his attentiveness and the “advice” that you heard. Do this calmly and try not to show the caustic nature of your phrases.

    It is worth noting that the more witnesses to the conflict, the better for you, because a rude person is unlikely to receive the necessary approval from the outside, and will most likely cause laughter and jokes in his address.

    Boringness

    This method can be used by administrators of forums, websites, blogs and social groups. networks.


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    Despite the fact that most community members are familiar with general rules, some still deliberately violate them, after which they express their dissatisfaction in private messages with administrators due to the fact that their access was denied.

    After all the arguments are over, these characters move on to outright rudeness and rudeness.

    The easiest way is to simply ban, but if you want to prove that you are right, try without emotions, describe in detail all the offender’s mistakes. At first, the interlocutor will resist and continue to “have fun” with rudeness, but when he realizes that they are communicating with him dryly, without emotion, he will simply leave behind.

    Ignoring

    Perhaps the most famous and simple method of dealing with rudeness. Sometimes silence is not only effective and safe, but also beautiful.


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    If you don’t need anything from a rude person, or you are simply not psychologically ready to enter into a debate with him, or if the “interlocutor” is simply out of his mind and can harm your health, just ignore him. Rude people want to win your attention, don't give them this joy.

    It is worth noting that you also need to ignore correctly. No need to include an offensive look and sighs- these are signals that you paid attention to him. Don't show any emotions, a boor is nothing to you.

    How to respond beautifully to rudeness


    There are several phrases that can be used when you are confronted with a rude person:

    "Sorry, is that all?"

    "I thought better of you"

    "Rudeness doesn't suit you very well"

    "Do you want a polite answer or the truth?"

    "Why are you trying to look worse than you really are?"

    “Like everyone else, I also have bad days. Don’t be upset, everything will work out for you.”

    “Yes, of course, go ahead. May luck be on your side” (in case someone jumps in line)

    "This role doesn't seem to suit you. What do you really want?"

    "Thank you for showing interest in me"

    "Do you want to offend me? Why?"

    How to respond to insult

    If you are accidentally or intentionally cursed, you should not take these words literally and take everything personally.

    Understand that if the one who insulted you Bad mood or is he just not well brought up, this does not mean that everything is your fault.


    In order to be able to react correctly to insults, you need, first of all, to know that the person who insults you in every possible way is himself a victim, namely a victim of the obstinacy of his character.

    Most often, those who “attack” and try to humiliate others are weak individuals who are simply not able to cope with negative emotions, which prompts them to throw it all out on others.

    What to do in response to an insult

    If you are insulted by a stranger

    The best option is to ignore it. Just try not to notice the one who is trying to insult you. Of course, there are times when you need to act differently, but most often you need to act as if the stranger is not there, and his words are an empty sound.

    If you were insulted by a loved one


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    From the very beginning, try to dot all the I's. You should calmly and directly tell him that the words spoken hurt you. The right step would be to discuss the situation.

    If you were insulted by a work colleague/boss

    Under such circumstances, try to carefully avoid the conflict. If a co-worker tirelessly insults you and keeps you silent doesn’t help, try responding with a neutral barb.


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    In the case of a boss, conflicts are not needed, which means do not respond to insults. Instead, imagine your manager as a petulant, pugnacious little child.

    In your head, pat him on the head, feed him porridge and help him sit on the potty. This is exactly the method that psychologists recommend. Not only will you survive the insults, but you will also be in a good mood, or at least it will make you smile and increase your productivity. In addition, the boss may also pay attention to your durability.

    How to respond to an insult

    The person who is trying to insult you wants to assert himself, to stand out, which means you need to give him a cold answer: “Well, have you asserted yourself at my expense?”

    When listening to such a person, try to understand what the goal is, why they want to insult you.

    * If you don’t know how to respond to an insult, then you need to know one important thing - no wellit is possible to reach the point of mutual insults and rash reactions.

    Besides the fact that it may look stupid, you are also susceptible to manipulation, which may end in a trap for you. You don't have to play by the rules that are imposed on you.

    *Another main rule - respond to rudeness calmly without losing your self-esteem. But it is worth noting that the cultural response to the “attack” of a boor most often does not produce any effect, because the game takes place on someone else's territory and not according to your rules.

    * When it comes to trolling, or other similar situations, it is best ignore the offender.


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    * It happens that you need to answer, but you know that all your arguments simply will not work against a stubborn rude person. In this case, the best option would be turn around and leave.

    * The person who insulted you or is trying to do so may simply be having a bad day. Therefore, from you it will be enough to ask: "Bad day?" . If a person is adequate, he will agree and may even ask for forgiveness.

    But, if it comes to a troll, then such a question is not only inappropriate, but can also lead to additional insults towards you.

    * Most often, responding to an insult is not a good strategy, and you can get away with it only by neutrally asking the person what he just said to you. Try to pretend that you didn't hear his words or didn't pay attention to them. In this case, only an outright boor will continue his “attacks”.

    * If you find yourself in a situation where it is simply necessary to respond to the offender, or you are strangled by the desire to do so, do not rush at him. The main thing is to be calm, cold in words and expressions. It is advisable to silence insults with witty remarks and only after the interlocutor has finished his monologue.

    * Sometimes an insult is more like a mockery. In this case, perhaps the best option would be to answer in the form of a joke, which not only will not offend the person, but will also maintain a normal relationship.

    One of the common mistakes that people make is an attempt to justify themselves, they say, "no, you're wrong, it's not my fault". Firstly, such a strategy can make you humiliated, and secondly, trying to justify yourself is simply pointless, because... As a rule, no one listens to excuses.

    Inconvenient questions

    “How much does it cost?”, “When are you getting married?”, “What is your salary?”- these questions are annoying, and despite the fact that asking them is bad manners, some still cannot restrain themselves.


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    There are several situations you can consider, but first let’s note a few universal answers.

    How to answer in an original way

    - “I am amazed at your ability to ask questions that can baffle you!”

    - “You are an amazing woman (man). I have always been amazed by your ability to ask uncomfortable (correct, difficult, rhetorical) questions!”

    - “I’ll be happy to try to answer your question, just answer first, why are you so interested in this?”

    - “For what purpose are you interested in this?”

    - “Do you really want to talk about this?” If the answer is yes, then simply answer: "And I'm not very good" - and end the dialogue with a smile.

    If you don’t really like the person and you have no desire to communicate with him, especially after an incorrect question, you can answer coldly: "It's my damn business."

    - Ask again: “I understand correctly that...”

    Questions about money

    When you are faced with an unpleasant question, you have every right not to give the other person any specific answer. For example, to the question "How much do you earn?" you can avoid answering “Like most, the average salary in the industry (significantly less than Abramovich).”


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    You can also answer this question with a counter question. For example, to the question "How much is the jacket?" You can ask your interlocutor how much his jacket costs. Another way to answer this question is significantly overestimate or underestimate the figure and then turn the conversation into a joke.

    Questions about work

    “What do you do?”, “What do you do at work?”


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    When answering such questions, psychologists advise naming the profession that can give you more confidence in what you do. If your work is different, you do many different things, you can sort all the work for a month into sections. This way you will know what takes the most time.

    Questions about your personal life

    “Why isn’t there a girl (boyfriend)?”, “When is the wedding?”, “Why haven’t you gotten married yet?”


    © Minerva Studio

    You shouldn't take such questions seriously. In response, you can ask your interlocutor why such an unusual question came to his mind. In this case, the interlocutor will find himself in an awkward situation.

    There is another option - just answer directly as it is. For example, to the question "Why one more (one)?" Proudly admit that you are patiently looking for your soul mate, who would not leave you in difficult times.

    The third option would be "mirroring". For example, "Am I correct in understanding that you don't mind holding a candle over my bed?" , or "...what, today, is your main task to discuss my personal life?" , or "...is interest in other people's troubles normal for you?"

    How to respond to rudeness

    Boors can be found everywhere. These are people who often experience pressure on themselves, which leads to rudeness as a weapon of defense.


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    Why are they rude?

    Reason 1: Despair


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    A person is not having a good day - so he is rude. For example, a saleswoman who is tired from the whole working day, a client, a colleague who is brought to stress.

    Most often, such people, after throwing out all their anger at someone, feel guilty and may even apologize.

    If you decide in such a situation to respond with the same weapon, then the feeling of guilt will go away and the person will think that being rude is normal.

    Reason 2: Self-affirmation

    When a boor humiliates another person, he feels superior to him, especially if this person, for one reason or another, cannot fight back the offender.


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    Usually such boors have, albeit not great, but still power. They believe that they can just take their anger out on those who depend on them and get away with it unpunished.

    Reason 3: The desire to be noticed

    If rudeness is an integral part of a person, then its roots can be hidden in childhood.


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    A child always wants attention and love from his parents. If he does not receive this, then he begins to be rude so that at least some attention will be paid to him. As a person ages, he uses the same strategy.

    Responses to rudeness

    Method 1: Don't take everything said to you personally.

    Often a person who is rude does not do it specifically to you - rather, it is anger at the world in general: ill-mannered youth, men are assholes, etc. and only the brute himself is white and fluffy.


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    One can only sympathize with such a boor, because... the world he lives in is not easy to live in. Remember, every person sees the world differently. If a boor says that you are an uneducated person, you can try to refute his statement with your knowledge, but this is unlikely to work.

    Method 2: A boor should not become the master of the situation

    Try not to give the boor power over the situation so that they don't feel stronger.


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    If your boss is rude to you, and it is impossible to get away from it, think about the fact that you are not chained to him for the rest of your life. You are not a slave, you are only doing your job professionally, i.e. you help him carry out his work, which means you can call yourself a partner in a certain business. You can demand more respect for yourself because... you have every right to do this.

    Method 3: Remember your rights

    When you are rude to public place, then we need to fight not with the offenders, but with their superiors.


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    Find out your first name, last name, position and contacts. You can ask for a complaint book, if there is one. If this does not help, try contacting a consumer protection society or a lawyer.

    Use your weapons - human rights and leverage. This method is suitable if the boor is an official, manager, waiter, security guard or other representatives of large organizations

    Method 4: Use your imagination

    Try to imagine the offender behind a glass wall: you see him, you notice that he is expressing something, but you simply do not hear.


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    You can also imagine a boor in the image of a big fish in an aquarium: it seems to be moving its lips, moving its fins, but it is not clear what all this is for.

    If you watched the movie "The Matrix", then you remember the moment when Neo stopped the bullets fired at him. Imagine that the rudeness thrown at you is like bullets, and you are invulnerable, and all the rudeness does not reach you, falling with a ringing sound on the floor.

    Method 5: Try to contact the boor

    Try to find out the reason for the aggression. For example, you can say: “Now you are being rude to me, why do you need this?” or “You have a smile on your face and yet you say mean things, so I haven’t figured out how to respond to your words yet.”


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    Perhaps the person who heard you will think about his actions, look at himself from the outside and rethink his behavior. You can use this method when communicating with people with whom you will have to meet and talk more than once - work colleagues, acquaintances, relatives.

    There is a chance that a person will look at himself from the outside and rethink something in his behavior.

    How to respond beautifully to rudeness


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    Rudeness can be treated well with politeness, which frightens boors, forcing them to be careful when communicating:

    - “You see, dear, I do not intend to communicate with you in such a tone.”

    - "Dear, you may have confused me with someone"

    If the boor just can’t stop after all your attempts, then save your nerves, wish him all the best and leave the place of conversation.

    Sometimes a boor needs to be put in his place, otherwise by your silence you will make them stronger. A good answer can close the mouth of a boor. But remember, being rude to someone who is rude does not make you superior.

    Try using humor. If someone is rude to you, smile and say "What a fool (fool, idiot) you are!" Such an act can anger the boor even more, whose reaction will make you laugh.

    Smiling back often irritates a boor, so smile sincerely.

    - “You deign to be rude to me... Why? Is your goal to offend me? Why?”

    Answer in such a way that your word is the last and then the rudeness will stop.

    Don't pay attention to the boor. Imagine the scenario in your head: “You are a leaf on the road... Everything passes by and doesn’t touch you in any way.” .

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“Why aren’t you married?”, “how much do you earn?”, “who will you vote for?” - these and other similar tactless questions make many of us shudder. What to do if your interlocutor asks a question, but you don’t want to or simply can’t answer it?

website will tell you about 9 ways to gracefully avoid answering. And the bonus at the end of the article will tell you what to do if you come across an annoying interlocutor for whom these tricks do not work.

1. Ask clarifying questions

To pull the rug out from under your interlocutor’s feet, ask him clarifying questions, and the more there are, the better. When answering them, he will get confused and lose the thread of the conversation. The main thing is to ask questions with a serious expression on your face so that your interlocutor does not feel there is a trick. By the way, if you are talking with someone who is not very close to you, you can refuse to answer questions about salary or work in general, citing trade secrets.

2. Give a compliment

Compliments related to the question you were asked will look simpler and more natural. For example, if you were asked about children, praise the interlocutor’s child or grandchild. And add some general answer - “everything has its time,” “as soon as possible,” “it’s not up to me,” and so on. People like compliments and at the same time they are a little embarrassed. Therefore, the interlocutor is unlikely to develop the topic further. The main thing is that the praise corresponds to the true state of affairs, otherwise your compliment will be perceived as sarcasm.

3. Clarify the reason for the question

Ask your interlocutor what prompted him to ask the question, and after answering, continue to develop this topic. For example, suggest one reason or another for the question. Thus, the conversation will change direction, and the uncomfortable question will remain unanswered.

4. Answer with a joke

You can laugh off an inappropriate question in cases where when there is confidence that the joke will be understood and appreciated. This method works best in a large group, because the more people there are, the higher the likelihood that someone will laugh and tell another joke in response, thereby saving you from having to answer the question.

5. Start pouring water

This method is often used by politicians and various public figures. As a result, the interlocutor seems to receive an answer to his question, but he will not be able to say exactly what exactly was answered. The method is ideal for people whose strong point is eloquence.

6. Answer a question with a question

Another favorite technique of politicians and other persons with high social status. This method is used quite often, which is why it often causes irritation. Therefore, it is better to use it only in exceptional cases.

7. Show off your intelligence

The method is useful if knowledge allows you to develop a deep discussion on the topic you set. A large number indeed interesting facts can distract even the most annoying interlocutor from the question asked.

8. Reframe the question

The point of this method is to make the interlocutor feel the absurdity and inappropriateness of his question. It is important not to overdo it with sarcasm,otherwise the interlocutor may be offended. Remember, your goal is to maintain this person's goodwill (as long as he doesn't ask inappropriate questions too often, of course).

Many of these questions are annoying simply because they are asked frequently and not always by those who should know the answers. But that is precisely why treating them too painfully will be the wrong reaction.

Relatives are overly interested in our personal lives, colleagues - in finances and career successes, everyone around us - in how we look and how we behave. Sometimes this is a formal way to maintain a conversation, sometimes it is the personal problems of the one who asks, and sometimes it is actually concern for us.

Does moral pressure interfere with your life? Let's develop our personality by watching the video!

The ability to competently respond to violation of personal space is a good practice for those who are inclined to succumb to pressure. No matter what question you are asked, our methods will help you answer any of them politely.

1. Philosophical answer

Who said that if a question is asked of you, then they should talk about you? You can simply speculate on a given topic. If you are not yet married, refer to the fact that family values ​​are changing a lot these days, men have become different, and the housing issue has even ruined everyone. In most cases, they will agree with you and you can complain together about the strangeness of life.

2. Social gossip

This is also essentially a change in the object of discussion. Tell us that the issue of your salary is currently being actively discussed, since according to rumors in competing companies, specialists in your profile have begun to earn more (less, take on new responsibilities, quit more often, etc.) For example, you can recall the stories of all your former colleagues and unfamiliar, even if they are no longer relevant.

3. Wisdom of the Ages

In the end, you don’t have to be an example for everyone, you are living your first life. But the classics have long spoken about this matter - don’t let wise quotes wasted in vain. Someone said that "every breakup is a step towards new meeting", most likely he also meant your breakup with your ex. Use aphorisms from social networks or make up your own. At the same time, you will come across as an intellectual.

4. White lies

It might even be funny. Pass off costume jewelry as jewelry, a friend as a lover, a get-together in a cafe as an important business meeting. Who knows, maybe your fantasy will come true, or maybe you will simply never return to this conversation again.

5. Comedy genre

Why create tension where there is already enough of it? Humor relaxes. The joke scheme is quite simple: portray the situation as absurd. When asked, answer that today they set the alarm early to make it to the registry office in time, but it’s a shame that they overslept. But tomorrow - definitely!

6. Forwarding

You have no idea how much your dress costs - it was given to you. Why don’t they get promoted up the ranks, ask my boss. When you have children, only God knows. In general, Google is helpful, but there is no demand from you.

A win-win option, since people are always pleased to act as a specialist. In response to an uncomfortable question, ask yourself: what to do to get married; how to persuade your husband to have a second child; where to find Good work? And in general, how to live?

8. Details

If we’re going to introduce you to the matter, then do it conscientiously. Describe all the details of your interviews, love stories of your youth and attempts to lose weight. One such conversation will be enough to discourage people from contacting you spontaneously for a long time.

9. Downplaying

Because your interlocutor’s goal is to increase it. You have nothing to answer because you don't ask such questions. You absolutely don’t care who marries you and when - you have other problems. You have no time for a career or happiness right now. Just shrug your shoulders.

10. Truth

Something that always completely disarms. An inconvenient question hits a sore spot, and only in this case does it work. If you really find it unpleasant to discuss a particular topic, then there is a problem that is important to solve. But for yourself, and not in order to avoid unnecessary conversations.

After a simple one-word greeting, asking about the current state of affairs is a common practice in most correspondence in in social networks and random encounters in a public place with familiar people. How to answer it, what does the interlocutor want to hear, and is there any point in thinking about responses?

How to answer formal questions correctly?

It is impossible to give a single and universal answer for all situations and people, so each time you have to navigate the situation and determine for what purpose such a question was asked. On social networks, formal phrases can often be heard from an old acquaintance with whom communication is poorly maintained, or not at all. unknown person who has decided to start communicating with you.


Moreover, 75% of dialogues with a stranger begin with a greeting and a question about life, and only 25% construct their starting phrases in a more original way. Are these people really interested in the current state of affairs, or did they not come up with any other ideas, but just wanted to get to know each other? It’s not easy to decide, and even more so to decide how to answer correctly.

During a live conversation, all the tips that apply to electronic communication also apply. But here it should be remembered that the interlocutor can see the emotions reflected on the face. Therefore, convincing someone that life is beautiful and wonderful, and things are steadily going uphill, should be this moment to sincerely believe in these words, so as not to demonstrate possible falsehood.

There is an important advantage in such dialogues online: at any time you can simply leave the conversation, citing business, work, etc. important factors that do not allow you to continue talking with a person you dislike. With someone who is interesting as an interlocutor, communication often develops independently. If this does not happen, and you don’t want to move to the stage of silence, you should make sure that your responses contain words and phrases that you can cling to in order to develop the topic. These may be response questions, but no longer formal, but personality-oriented, or mentions of common interests, if they are known.

How to answer the question “How are you?” from a stranger?

  • If you don’t want to continue a conversation with a stranger, it’s enough to get rid of it with a general, meaningless phrase. Judging by her emotional coloring, it will become clear that further dialogue will not work out. “Fine”, “Everything is fine”, etc., answers that do not allow you to plunge into details, will allow you to end the conversation without negativity. You can also confuse your interlocutor by making the answer any overly abstruse and overloaded sentence taken from scientific literature.
  • If the stranger is unpleasant, it is permissible to use harsher phrases: “why are you interested?”, “would you like to discuss this?”, “none of your business,” etc. The degree of negative emotion in them varies depending on the other person's personality, but it is not advisable to overdo it. Politeness has not been abolished even on the Internet, so “I don’t intend to discuss this with strangers” is much more tactful than “leave me alone.” And, of course, simple silence, which is resorted to as a last resort, is not discounted.
  • Do you want to continue the conversation because the stranger managed to interest you? Then it’s better to forget about “good” and “wonderful”: it’s difficult to catch hold of them with the next question, and in the end it risks becoming “what are you doing?” Again, the answer will take some work. The best version would be any short phrase that requires continuation of the conversation. Those. it can loosely touch on any topic of interest - from hobbies to the weather. The most banal thing: “wonderful, only the rain prevented the walk” and similar answers. In the case when the interlocutor is also interested in communication, further dialogue will not begin on impersonal questions.

We are looking for an answer to the question “how is life?” from a friend


If a question about life comes from an old acquaintance with whom there is almost no communication, but sometimes short, seemingly formal dialogues occur, the variety of answers increases. Don’t want to share the details of your own life? You can answer in a similar way, addressing the interlocutor’s question in a paraphrased form: “how are you?”, “What can I say about me? It’s better to tell me about yourself.” This option is also suitable for politely translating the topic, when it is inconvenient to directly explain to a person that there is no desire to talk with him.

Does the source of the question have a sense of humor? The original rhyming answer will be appreciated by the play on words: “I didn’t have time to get married, it’s too early to die,” “reminds me of a taxi and a fairy tale - prices are rising, difficulties are progressing” or any other variations. However, such ideas are more applicable when communicating with a person you know well and with whom you are on friendly terms.

In the case when the question comes from a relative or other relatively close person, it is likely that he is really interested in getting acquainted with the events of that period of your life that he managed to miss. How much detail to delve into them is a personal decision for everyone. Don't want to share your problems? It is possible to outline only positive side, trying not to describe everything. There is a high degree of trust - it is worth delving into the details. The only thing is that you don’t need to lie: to conceal some information is not to lie.

When questioned by an unpleasant person whose interest in your life is perceived with suspicion or other negativity, you can embellish the reality. True, here too you need to stay within limits, because global deception in the presence of mutual acquaintances is easy to uncover. A certain amount of causticity and sarcasm are allowed. Everything is selected according to the personality of the person with whom the dialogue is being conducted. “Against the background of children in Africa - amazing, next to the oligarchs - mediocre,” etc.

After the stage of asking questions about life, another question is often used that sets the teeth on edge of users of social networks, a question about the current occupation. He can look both like “what are you doing?” and like “what are you doing?” It’s easy to answer his latest version in a different way, perceiving it as an interest in a hobby. But what to do with the other, more common one?

Again, it is necessary to proceed from the personality of the interlocutor. A stranger or someone with whom there is no desire to develop a dialogue? Make do with a sarcastic or malicious phrase, after which the conversation is unlikely to continue. For example: “I’m designing a plate for green men” or “I’m choosing a Lexus in the showroom.”

More polite options, suggesting the end of the conversation, may sound like “immersed in work” or “started an interesting movie, got ready to watch it.” If the questioner does not calm down, the scheme returns to the one used with the question “how are you?”: a monosyllabic answer and silence. Harsh, but often very effective.

Even if a standard set of questions haunts you day after day on social networks and random encounters on the street, the main thing is to radiate positive emotions and not take it out on your interlocutor. A sarcastic phrase will get you much more than a boorish answer. And be sure to take into account the type of relationship - this will determine your reaction to the question

This is one of the first desires that arises after an insult. But a retaliatory attack is appropriate only if it:

  • witty;
  • happens among family or friends;
  • defuses the situation rather than aggravates the conflict.

In all other cases, even if you consider yourself a wit worse than Oscar Wilde, responding to insult with insult is not the best way. This way you stoop to the level of your boorish opponent and make it clear that his words hurt you, that is, there may be some truth in them.

2. Make a joke

The difference between a witty insult and a humorous response is that in the latter case, you are making fun of the situation itself. The advantages of this strategy are obvious: the insult loses its toxicity, tension, and the audience (if there is one) takes your side.

In this case, you can also take a pseudo-self-deprecating position. This will confuse your opponent and disguise the sarcasm.

Example 1: A colleague says you prepared an ugly presentation.

Answer: “Perhaps you are right. Next time I won’t ask my five-year-old son for help.”

Example 2: A stranger calls you names.

Answer: “Thank you, this is very valuable information. You opened my eyes to my shortcomings. There will be something to think about over lunch.”

3. Accept

In some cases, it is actually worth analyzing words that seem offensive to you. Especially if they come from people close and respected by you. In this case, take their remarks not as an insult, but as criticism that can make you better.

It would be a good idea to think about people's motives and find out what exactly made them use harsh language. Perhaps this is a violent reaction to your less than angelic behavior.

4. Respond to intent, not words.

Any insult always has a hidden purpose. Make the secret obvious: designate it.

For example, in response to rude words, say, “Wow! Something really serious happened between us, since you decided to hurt me.”

So, on the one hand, you can unsettle your opponent, and on the other, find out the reason for his negative attitude.

5. Stay calm

If the insult comes not from a loved one, but from a colleague, acquaintance, or even a stranger, never show that the words hurt you. Most likely, behind them lies uncertainty, dissatisfaction own life and the desire to simply take it out on you. Don't let the trick work, react calmly and with a smile.

If necessary, continue to pursue your line: ask what exactly caused such a reaction in the person, without paying attention to his words.

6. Ignore

Often the best answer is no answer. If we are talking about Internet trolls, you can simply not respond to their comments or send boors to. Well, “offline” you can always let the insult fall on deaf ears or walk away. You have every right to do this.

An example from ancient Roman history... One day, in a public bath, someone hit the politician Cato. When the offender came to apologize, Cato replied: “I don’t remember the blow.”

This phrase can be interpreted as follows: “You are so insignificant that I not only do not care about your apology, but I did not even notice the insult itself.”

7. Use the law

You can hold the offender accountable, or at least threaten him with it. Punishment for insult is prescribed in the Code of Administrative Offences, but libel is already within the scope of criminal law. If you are insulted by your boss, you can contact the HR department.

The main thing is to remember: no one has the right to infringe on your honor, dignity and reputation. But you must answer people in the same way. Otherwise, any recommendations are meaningless.

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