Phrases that smart people don't say. Eleven phrases that smart people never say. "A journey of a thousand miles begins with one step"

03.03.2020

Meanwhile, smart people They have long figured out how to replace some taboo statements.

1 You were too good for him!

At first glance, this is one of those phrases that is usually used to console a friend who has experienced a breakup with her partner.

He has lost a lot.

2 You look great for your age!
Why you shouldn't say this: A completely neutral, at first glance, phrase turns in a condescending
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However, in fact, this is partly an insult to her taste and evidence of her inability to understand people: “Well, you chose a guy for yourself, and how much time you spent on him!”
consolation: “Compared to other old people, you look even more or less.”

Wow, you look absolutely amazing!

2 You look great for your age!
3 I try, but I can’t!
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However, in fact, this is partly an insult to her taste and evidence of her inability to understand people: “Well, you chose a guy for yourself, and how much time you spent on him!”
A phrase that is forgivable for a 10-year-old girl. It's not very respectable for a grown girl to beg for emotional approval for not achieving a goal. It is better to either recognize the goal as unattainable, or completely change tactics.

I try as hard as possible.

2 You look great for your age!
4 I achieved everything myself! From birth we are surrounded by people who in one way or another influence our formation and development. We, in turn, draw conclusions and learn something

But it is rude to devalue the help of these people.

2 You look great for your age!
Thanks to my parents and the support of loved ones, I was able to achieve this.

Life is not fair. You need to come to terms with this. By complaining about the slightest manifestation of injustice, you become inexperienced and naive in the eyes of others.

2 You look great for your age!
Eradicate this phrase and replace it with something more constructive.

However, in fact, this is partly an insult to her taste and evidence of her inability to understand people: “Well, you chose a guy for yourself, and how much time you spent on him!”
For example, if your boss makes an unfair decision, in your opinion, you can correctly ask him: “What led to such a decision? May I know why you didn’t entrust this to me?”

6 Maybe I’ll say something stupid now, but...

2 You look great for your age!
A phrase that is always used just to point out people's mistakes, which none of us like.

Next time you won't make such a mistake.

2 You look great for your age!
8 Oh, I had this happen too!

However, in fact, this is partly an insult to her taste and evidence of her inability to understand people: “Well, you chose a guy for yourself, and how much time you spent on him!”
This phrase can only be said to a friend who has just taken a pair of shoes to the store that didn’t suit her at all.

However, you should not say this if she is sharing a personal problem with you. After all, she wants to talk it out, and not listen about how it was with you.

2 You look great for your age!
Many people face this, but you will definitely overcome it.

You can’t say that, if only for the reason that you are not the measure of other people’s problems.

2 You look great for your age!
Very soon this problem will not be as important to you as it is now. Everything will be alright.

A catchphrase that can play a bad joke on you. Hearing your tearful “You don’t love me!”

once, a man, of course, will rush to passionately assure you of the opposite, the second time he will coolly ignore you, and the third time he will think carefully: perhaps you are right...

I miss you.

Some phrases in conversation put you in a bad light, showing stupidity, naivety and immaturity. What phrases do smart people never say? Don't make these mistakes. Words sometimes fail us, although we say hackneyed expressions. Based on the conversation, others evaluate the interlocutor and his level of intelligence. Watch your tongue. What phrases do smart people never say?

1. “It’s always been done this way.” Modern world

It develops very quickly and what was recently normal becomes obsolete within a month. This phrase demonstrates a person as lazy and incapable of change. 2. “It’s not fair.”

Everyone knows that life is unfair. But whoever says this looks naive, stupid and immature. Try to speak more constructively and factually. 3. “You always...”

Generalization does not allow communication to improve, but looks like criticism. A healthy conversation will not come out of this. 4. "I'll try."

These words indicate that you doubt your abilities and capabilities. These are the words of extremely insecure and weak people. 5. “This might be a stupid idea/question.”

Such phrases undermine your authority, and people are critical of your interlocutor in advance. When we tell a person something like this, we imply that it was a problem, but we neutralize our help and reduce its significance. It's better to say "please".

8. “He’s lazy/stupid/weird.” Disparaging words about your friend or colleague show that you are not the best side. By saying this, the interlocutor thinks that you can say similar things about him. You will be treated worse.

9. “I hate work/business/occupation.” Such a phrase makes a person a whiner, a skeptic and a pessimist. And they don’t like people like that.

1. The deadline was yesterday!

What a twist! Agree, no one should work hard or overtime because a colleague is forgetful or inability to plan deadlines. This behavior is not entirely tactful and not at all professional, and is also very angry.

When working in conjunction with another person, it is important to think not only about yourself, but also about your colleague-partner. It is likely that he has other tasks waiting to be completed. But because of someone’s carelessness, he will now be forced to abandon them and then finish them at the last moment.

2. I'll try, but I don't promise anything.

At work, everyone has certain responsibilities that it is advisable to perform on time. Most likely, these are regularly repeated tasks that are known in advance. And the employee either does them or doesn’t. There is no third.

Imagine this situation: during an interview, a candidate asks a future manager about the amount of expected salary. And this is what he answers: “Should I pay you forty thousand every month? Well, I’ll try, but I don’t promise anything.” What kind of stability and confidence in the future can we talk about here?

3. I didn’t touch anything, it just broke!

“It just broke” is the worst way to admit guilt for something. As practice shows, something breaks on its own in extremely rare cases. More often than not, someone helps the breakdown happen. It is extremely absurd to make excuses and refer to unknown destructive forces in such a situation.

If you are truly at fault, it is better to admit it honestly and apologize. You can, for example, say: “Yes, guys, I broke it. Sorry, I’ll fix everything now.” It is advisable to do this yourself and immediately, and not sit in the corner until the last minute, hoping that no one will notice.

4. I didn’t expect that they would entrust this to you!

A colleague shared his small achievement and clearly expected to receive a little praise in return, rather than a derogatory tirade. It would be much more appropriate to rejoice at the employee’s successes without trying to find some kind of catch in the situation. You could say “Congratulations!” or “Wow, great!” or just remain silent if it’s really offensive.

5. I heard you

The impression from the phrase “I heard you” is extremely contradictory. There is nothing particularly bad about it - the interlocutor understood what he was told and even answered. But the initiator of the conversation clearly expected to receive a more animated reaction, and not just an indifferent confirmation that his opponent did not have hearing problems. One gets the feeling that the interlocutor simply wants to get rid of the conversation quickly.

6. I don't get paid for this!

A great phrase to evade the unpleasant or unnecessary additional burden that some people for some reason always want to puzzle others with. It also says a lot about the person who pronounces it.

Most often, this turns out to be some petty character who demonstratively proves to the whole world that he doesn’t spend his time at work in vain. And he is not distracted by any nonsense that does not concern his direct duties. And in general, he values his precious time, not like compassionate colleagues, everyone around him is free.

7. Send us a brief and we’ll brainstorm

Oh, these linguistic mutants. Sometimes you really can’t do without borrowing, but when work communication turns into simultaneous translation, this is a reason to think about it. Or use a dictionary.

8. I did everything I could! I do not like? Find someone who will do better

There are no irreplaceable employees. Maybe in some companies it will be possible to pull off such a trick painlessly, but the chance is slim. Most likely, management will listen to the advice of a short-sighted employee and simply find someone better for his position.

9. I told you so! I knew it! I told you so!

No matter how great the temptation is to say this sacramental phrase out loud, hold on. A person who complains about difficulties or failures does not want to hear an unfounded triumph in response. If you think about it, being right that everything will be bad is an extremely dubious pleasure.

10. Calm down! Relax! Do not mind it!

For a person who is in trouble, this phrase and all its derivatives are like a red rag for a bull. One hundred percent rage is guaranteed.

11. It’s a shame not to know!

There is no shame in not knowing something; it is a shame in not wanting to learn anything. Even the coolest professional may not understand something. Reproaching for ignorance is the last thing. It’s better to just take it and give it a hint, especially if you’ve already been asked for help.

12. I don’t care how you do it

No comments. Mutual support and assistance to each other at work? No, that won't happen.

13. If you are in my place, you will decide, but for now keep quiet

A favorite phrase of arrogant leaders or people with the slightest influence. Is it worth reminding that few people like arrogant people? It would be much more effective to use power for the benefit of someone, but not in order to harm or supposedly put someone in their place.

14. Nothing personal, just business

This phrase sounds forced and inappropriate from everyone except Al Capone. So if you are not the leader of the Chicago or some other mafia, then it is better to moderate the degree of insolence. In a situation where you need to do something beneficial for yourself, but bad for others, it is important, first of all, to remain human and not throw around such phrases, trying to justify your immoral behavior.

15. Your humble servant wishes everyone a good day

The times of servants and masters are long gone, but for some reason stupid figures of speech remain. Science has never been able to figure out why “your humble servant,” “good day,” “this is the place to be,” and other monstrous cliches are still used in speech.

What phrases from your colleagues irritate you? Share in the comments.

We all said things that took on their own meaning for those around us. An ordinary phrase spoken for encouragement can turn into a terrible hint - it’s all about the mood of a person who is capable of interpreting your every word in his own way. We simply do not have enough social mobility to accurately understand all the hidden meanings of what is being said. We are too focused on our behavior and do not notice the effect on the interlocutor - but not using the power of words to the full is simply stupid.

I could
Not bad idea
Wow, you've lost weight!
You've really looked younger!
However
You look tired
Don't be offended, but
I could be wrong but
As you know, many people
She didn't deserve you

I could

The very beginning of the phrase tells the interlocutor that you are not going to do something. This formulation can be used in an extremely limited number of cases: if you are threatening, if you feel immeasurably superior to your counterpart, and if you simply do not think when you speak.

Not bad idea

It just sounds great - “not a bad idea.” What does this even mean? Did you like it? You didn't like it and you just don't want to offend? Don't be afraid to be more definitive in your judgment. This is a much better solution than leaving your interlocutor at a loss.

Wow, you've lost weight!

A great compliment, indeed. It will be especially pleasant to hear this for a person who has always been embarrassed about his excess weight. Another reminder of problems - The best way make an ill-wisher. Try not to make this mistake.

You've really looked younger!

Try saying a similar phrase to a girl. It would be better to perform this trick over the phone: even this way, you can be sure that you have gotten yourself into considerable trouble. Nobody likes unnecessary mention of years gone by forever.

However

This one word is enough to change the entire meaning of everything said earlier. “We are the largest company in this field, we can handle any order, however, this is exactly what we are not able to do.” Seems like a lame excuse. Don't diminish your dignity with such petty tricks.

You look tired

Tired people are incredibly attractive - they have dull eyes, tangled hair, problems concentrating and are, of course, very happy to see everyone around them. Statement of the fact “you look tired” has never helped anyone. One such phrase can ruin your mood for the whole day - that’s why you should remove it from your vocabulary once and for all.

Don't be offended, but

Double negatives have never brought anyone any good. By starting a sentence in this way, you are already setting the person up for self-defense. Everything you say in the future will not make any sense to the listener: he will only remember the main message. Don't use this phrase unless you want to deliberately piss off your interlocutor.

I could be wrong but

Another way to negate all subsequent words. Don't try to insure yourself against possible error- no one will appreciate this. Do you doubt the correctness of your judgment, but think that you should express it? Deprive your words of all “saving” words and phrases. Confidence is what people remember first.

As you know, many people

Who knows? And who are these thousands of knowledgeable people? To construct a phrase in this way means to show in advance your ignorance of the subject of the conversation. A person who knows the material will not resort to such vague formulations, designed only to distract the attention of the interlocutor.

She didn't deserve you

Of course, because your interlocutor generally does not know how to understand people and problems with own self-esteem force him to choose a partner of lower rank over and over again. At least that's how this phrase sounds from the outside. The ideal option would be not to interfere in other people’s relationships at all, but if this happens, then at least try to avoid such clichés.

Culture

" Wise people speak because they have something to say. Fools because they have to say something ." Plato

The words we speak can be interpreted in different ways: positive, negative or neutral.

Intelligent, emotionally mature people usually speak in a cautious manner, choosing words to minimize a negative or obscure response.

Of course, we've all said something we later regretted. Perhaps our words hurt others, intentionally or accidentally, and we wanted to take them back.

Emotional intelligence is defined by the ability to recognize, manage and express emotions and regulate relationships. It relates to the ability to relate to other people's emotions and experiences.

This type of intelligence plays a decisive role in what to say and what to remain silent about.

Here 10 phrases that emotionally intelligent people try to avoid.

Phrases that should not be said

1. "It's not fair."

Yes, life is unfair, and this is what adults understand. Perhaps what happened was unfair, perhaps even grossly unfair. However, we must remember that the people around us often do not know about what happened, and even if they are privy to the details, this phrase does not solve the problem.

No matter how difficult it may be, focus your attention and efforts on solving the problem.

You will feel better, maintain your dignity and possibly solve the problem.

2. "You look tired."

The point is this: you have absolutely no idea what is going on in a person's life.

When you say, “You look tired,” no matter how good your intentions are, this makes it clear to a person that his problems are visible to everyone.

Instead, rephrase your sentence or question in a more empathetic way. For example, “Are you okay?” to show the person that you care about what is happening to them.

3. "For your age..."

For example, “You look great for your age” or “For a woman, you have achieved a lot.”

Chances are that the person you're talking to is well aware of age and gender bias and may be offended by it.

No need to make reservations, just give a compliment.

4. “As I said earlier...”

Who among us hasn't forgotten something from time to time? This phrase implies that you are offended by having to repeat yourself, and that you are somehow better than the other person.

To be fair, repeating the same thing over and over again can be annoying to someone. Refrain from expressing your irritation and try to clarify what you wanted to say.

Just remind the person from time to time.

The meaning of phrases

5. “You never” or “You always”

As a rule, these words are pronounced sarcastic or overly dramatic. Very often they are used to offend someone either out of anger or contempt.

Justify what exactly the person did and provide details. For example, “I noticed what you keep doing… is there anything I can do to help/is there anything I need to know?”

6. "Good luck"

Many may argue that this phrase should not be uttered, and quite rightly so.

But there is a logical explanation for this: luck takes the result out of a person's hands and subjects it to external influences or chance.

Has anyone ever used their powers to win the lottery? No, it's luck.

Phrase " I know that you have all the necessary qualities" can build a person's confidence better than the concept of luck.

7. "It doesn't matter to me."

When someone asks for your opinion, they do so expecting a constructive response, any response. When you say that "It doesn't matter to me," it implies that either the situation is not of great importance to you or the time it takes to respond is not a priority.

Instead of this, get to know the person's situation better. If you don't have enough time, suggest another time when you can listen to him.

8. "With all due respect..."

Stop and think about whether the words you say now are actually influenced by the degree of respect for him?

If you can honestly answer yes, go ahead. Just remember that the way you speak, your gestures and facial expressions, as well as your intonation will immediately make it obvious whether it is said with respect or not.

On the other hand, if this phrase is said on autopilot in order to wedge itself into a conversation that has nothing to do with respect, it is best to hold back.

9. "I told you so"

This phrase is full of arrogance and a sense of superiority. When you read this phrase, you probably imagine children playing on the playground, which makes it sound childish and immature.

You have warned a person about the consequences of certain actions, and perhaps he has learned his lesson.

Find another way to communicate with someone who made a bad decision without expressing contempt. Perhaps the person needs help that we cannot give.

10. "I give up."

Although this phrase seems quite innocent, it is a statement that we are unable to overcome something that is right in front of our noses. Perhaps it's a terrible boss, a difficult project, or an arrogant employee.

But remember that you are much stronger, smarter, more capable than you think. There is nothing you can't overcome. " I can" are the only words you need.